All posts by Anna

Food.

Earlier this week, Don started his “low-iodine diet” in preparation for exciting radioactive iodine therapy next month. He tells me he’s not allowed to eat milk or milk-products, soy or soy-based products, egg yolks, anything from the sea, iodized table salt, and all restaurant foods.

Food restrictions are pretty common for people with disabilities. A friend of mine discovered her chronic pain and fatigue was influenced, at least in part, by her wheat allergy, and described at length to me the perils of “hidden wheat” in things like Twizzlers, which is a brand of red liquorish available in North America. Another gets flair-ups if she thinks about stepping away from her gluten-free diet. Some people have serious allergies to corn, and must avoid any and all things with corn and high-fructose corn syrup. There are very specific diets required for people on certain types of medications, with certain types of short-term and long-term medical conditions, people with diabetes, and people preparing for types of surgeries. Many people recovering from Cancer treatments, surgery, or eating disorders, as well as people on certain types of medications that cause dramatic weight loss, are pushed (or required) to consume those “nutritional shakes” or other forms of meal replacements.

You know what’s fun for most of the above?

How incredibly expensive all of this stuff is.

So, let me go back to Don. Right now, all of Don’s favourite foods, and everything we’ve had stocked in the freezer, are off-limits. He tried to pick up rice milk so he could have some cereal, but surprise! Most rice milk in Canada is made with salt, except a very specific (expensive) brand that isn’t sold at our grocery store. So, either we need to go to the more expensive store downtown, I need to make rice milk (I have a recipe), or he needs to not have milk with his cereal for the next two weeks. We can’t find any bread we can guarantee is made without salt, so either he goes without bread at all, or someone makes him special salt-free bread. Today, while I was away, I think he ate some special, expensive, peanut-only peanut butter and salt-free rice cakes.

Because I’ve been busier than anyone probably should be, we’ve mostly been relying on very cheap, easy-prep frozen meals that are basically salt with food in between. I’m no less busy, but now Don needs to be eating so-called “real” foods that are time-consuming to prepare, and often very expensive to purchase, especially in comparison to how we normally do the food-thing.

If you’re not on a restricted diet, I recommend checking out some of the “special” foods that people on restricted diets need to purchase. See how expensive gluten-free foods are. Compare prices of cow milk, soy milk, rice milk, and nut milk. See how many things have “corn” in the ingredients list, and try and sort out how expensive it would be to try and eat nothing with corn in it, while still eating enough. Look at some of the stuff on the shelf and try and sort out what has “hidden” wheat in it.

The cost of these items is especially relevant because so many people with disabilities live near, at, or below the poverty line for their respective countries. Don and I are able to afford to spend extra money on this restricted diet because of family support, but this isn’t an option for very many people. If you do not have a restricted diet, imagine trying to afford the foods that allow you to eat without causing flare-ups in your chronic pain condition.

Imagine as well – and this, of course, applies even when one doesn’t have restricted diets – trying to put the energy and time into preparing these foods when dealing with second shift for the sick. Imagine trying to balance it all while some stranger tells you that your, or your kid’s, disability can be magically cured if you put your family on a special, expensive, restrictive, time-consuming diet.

Don and I are incredibly privileged in this. I can take the time and make him rice milk so he doesn’t have to eat dry cereal, and we can afford to run out to the store and buy those pricey egg-whites in a carton things. And this is a restricted diet he needs to be on for a little over two weeks, and then it’s done. So many people with disabilities do not have these options. It’s eat stuff that makes you sick, or don’t eat enough at all.

I wish I had some solution I could offer to this problem, some nice little bow of hope I could tie this post up with. All I have is the knowledge that these restrictive diets aren’t things people are on for fun, but because the alternatives for them are sickness or pain. And yet, the foods people are required to eat are priced like they’re luxuries.

Recommended Reading for April 28, 2010

Blogging Against Disablism Day, May 1st 2010 Reminder: Blogging Against Disablism Day is coming up on May 1. Diary of a Goldfish has hosted BADD since 2006. It’s an awesome blogswarm, and it’s this Saturday. You can participate by spreading the word, making your own post, commenting on people’s posts, and/or linking posts for others.

Remembering and Commemorating a Complicated Past [Nellie McClung supported Eugenics in Canada, specifically the sterilization of undesirables.]

White continues in his article to discuss some of the basic historic contours of eugenics in Canada, noting briefly that Tommy Douglas – the social democratic father of Medicare – was a proponent, and sterilization was made provincial policy in Alberta and British Columbia. There was a long and brutal history of eugenics in Canada, with patients being sterilized without their knowledge. For example, in Alberta, Leilani Muir received appendix surgery in 1959 and was sterilized without her knowledge, a fact that she discovered only years later when she was unable to conceive. It wasn’t until 1996 that she was able to achieve some justice, setting the path for many other victims to settle with the provincial government.

In my own teaching this year, I found eugenics a tricky subject to tackle.We had a great debate in our tutorial. The prevailing view was that eugenics was ‘fascist,’ thanks to an article we had read that week on Nazi reproductive policies. Thanks to the memory of the Second World War, this is the popular memory, and was instrumental in dismantling many forced sterilization and eugenics programs after it all came to light. Yet once I began bringing up the history of eugenics in Canada, from Tommy Douglas to Leilani Muir, one student gutsily argued that eugenics was ‘progressive’ for the time, with respects to public health, poverty, etc. It was an uncomfortable discussion, to be sure, when speaking of these devastating policies that had such an impact on people’s reproductive rights and privileges. But these are the same questions that must vex people as they ponder whether to honour somebody like Nellie McClung. At the time, how common were her views? Ought she to know that they were wrong?

Book Review: Wintergirls

Anderson uses a number of typographical and structural tricks in this book—crossed out words, chapter numbers counting down, and others I won’t spoil by revealing— and they’re all there for a reason and they all work. The supporting characters, unusually for a novel which is so firmly set within the point of view of a character being sucked into a solipsistic state of mental illness, are sharply believable and non-stereotypical despite those constraints. (Since I know everyone who’s already read the book will be wondering, yes, I did indeed loathe the “free-spirited nonconformist” guy she gets involved with, but thankfully Anderson did not represent him as the undiluted essence of awesome that I dreaded the moment he launched into his defense of mooching food from other diners’ plates.)

President Obama: A Transgender Veteran Is Not An ”Impersonator,” ”It,” Or ”Shim”

Dear President Barack Obama,
My name is Autumn Sandeen, I’m a retired, disabled Fire Controlman, First Class Petty Officer; I retired in 2000 from the U.S. Navy after twenty years of service. You may know my name already, as I was one of the six military veterans who handcuffed ourselves to the White House fence on Tuesday, April 20th, 2010, to put pressure on you to include the repeal of Don’t Ask, Don’t Tell in your submission of the Defense Authorization Budget. I am writing today to bring to your attention the discriminatory behavior I was subjected to as a transgender woman by your federal law enforcement officers.

Dreamwidth has a new community: Disabled Rage

This is a community for all of us with disabilities to rage about the overwhelming ableist bullshit in the world around us. It’s a place to vent our anger and frustration with the inaccessibility, the condescension, the ignorance, the mistreatment – in short, the rage-making things we’re forced to fight every day.

This is a rage community. We like anger. We think it’s healthy and happy to be angry. Rage is most effective when it stays more or less on target, though, and to that end, the comm has a few guidelines.

Links & Things

fter missing last week’s episode of Parenthood, I watched this week, only to be annoyed and un-entertained again. More “woe is me, I have an autistic child” dramatizing, more cliches and sappiness.

But I have to admit that I was personally hoping that Sydney would turn out to be on the spectrum, too.

Why? Well, because having more than one autistic character in one work shows audiences that not all autistic people are alike–including those who share an “Asperger’s” designation. It also helps to avoid stereotypes, as perhaps writers won’t feel compelled to shoe-horn every single autistic trait into one character, as so many do. I actually think the Parenthood writers have been doing a fairly good job in presenting a believable character so far, but it can’t hurt to have another character. And a girl! Girls and women on the spectrum are so rarely represented and I was kind of hoping there’d be a concrete example. Alas, no.

Hell Hath No Fury

Like a woman after her insurance benefits.

Last week I was told my insurance company wouldn’t cover any more PT sessions.

However I could pay out of pocket and could continue to be treated.

The verdict that was reached that my PT would try to talk to the insurance company personally and rewrite the progress note. There’s no point to pay for something out of pocket that I’m already paying an insurance company to pay for. It’d be like paying for the same thing twice, actually it is.

Susan recommends a BBC radio programme about language & disability that is available online till next Tuesday. I know I can access BBC radio programmes in Canada, so I assume they’re available everywhere if your computer/download limit can handle them.

Hot Pieces of Ace is a new asexual youtube channel.

Ontarians! The Law Commission of Ontario is at the Consultation Stage regarding how the new accessibility laws will be implemented. There are focus groups!

Has your country ratified the UN Rights and Dignity of Persons with Disabilities? Or has it, like mine, only agreed with parts of it?

The International Network of Women with Disabilities spoke at a parallel side-meeting to the 54th Commission on the Status of Women.

Recommended Reading for April 27, 2010

A young Indian woman, wearing a brightly-patterned sari, using Sign.
A young deaf woman talks passionately as lunch is served following the Kerala Sign Language Bible dedication event in Kochi, India. Over 1200 deaf people attended the event, a small representation of the estimated 9 million deaf people in India.
For more: Door International

Where the Disabled are not welcome

I would love it if you would spend a day looking at the various buildings that you enter and consider how easy they are to enter or exit. If there are no barriers to entrance, how wide is the walk way? Is it easy to negotiate without pulling things off of the racks or shelves? Are items set down low so that they are easy to reach? If someone is using a mobility devise, is the isle wide enough to go down with another person, or will the mobility device completely block the way? Is staff easily visible to help with items? Are the bathrooms completely accessible? Is the change room completely accessible?

The Kids are (kinda) alright: crack babies speak out [There’s a video that opens this piece – as I’m compiling these links, I can’t see it, so I can’t tell you what’s in it. Hence I have the note to edit this post before it goes live]

I enjoyed Vargas’ article, but I still have questions surrounding the role of race.

Crack was a drug with a heavy racial identification – while all types of people used it, the most prominent image of a crack user was a black person. Vargas’ article discusses how experts learned from the crack baby hysteria and have not rushed to proclaim dire circumstances for children that are turning up meth exposed. But is the lack of hype due to meth being a white identified drug? Also, the pictorial accompanying the article focuses on Anzelone, and his nuclear family. Was there a difference in recovery and allocation resources by race? If so, how did that impact the lives and fates of these kids?

Following Up On What Neil Gaiman Said

Part of why I am taking the time to lay it out is my second reason for this post. I think it important that we see how celebrity fandom can obscure the work that my original post (and all my work on this blog) is trying to do. That is, pushing everyone to think about HOW they think about American Indians, what they THINK they know about American Indians, and how all of that comes together in the words they write and speak aloud.

Why are iPad Factory Workers killing themselves?

A growing string of worker suicides and attempts has plagued a Chinese factory operated by Foxconn, the China-based tech company that produces, among other products, the new Apple iPad. In the past month, four employees at a single factory have attempted suicide, and 11 workers have killed themselves since 2007. And perhaps even more telling, all four of the most recent attempts have taken place at the factory. What is happening to these workers that is causing so many to turn to suicide?

The Madwoman in the Attic

Unfortunately, the programme finishes on the rather clichéd interpretation that the novels demonstrate how women who didn’t conform ended up being branded mad and locked up – essentially, madness as a form of female repression.

This is the classic feminist criticism of historical ideas about madness and despite there being some truth to it, it is only supportable by ignoring the other side of the coin – the traditional interplay between insanity and masculinity.

News Headlines:

Canada: Manitoba Police use taser on mental health patient

US: Civil Rights Division pushes for Internet Accessibility

Taking a fresh look at brain injury: Having troops in combat has revived interest in concussive effects of bomb blasts

Apple admits using Child Labour [in a plant where people have been disabled by chemicals]

Signal Boost: Customer Service for PWD Survey

Customer Service Survey

Help change business practices toward people with disabilities!!

Many people with disabilities face challenges when trying to access everyday goods and services.

Ensuring accessible quality customer service to all is becoming a business and legal imperative.

PSN – Performance Solutions Network and LLR & associates are seeking your opinions. We want to understand the major barriers and issues you experience when attempting to access every day goods and services and quality customer service. We also are seeking your ideas and suggestions on what can be done to make your customer service experiences better.

Survey!

Recommended Reading for April 26, 2010

As I’m writing this, I’m still on my trip, so again – very quick! [The conference has been awesome, y’all. Seriously – I met so many great people and had so many great conversations. And people liked my presentation!]

The Lady Thing I Won’t Talk About, Even With Feminists

So, I have been thinking (ahahaha, I know, right? I NEVER do that). And it was because of the Jezebel post about the MTV True Life episode, which I just watched, on Body Dysmorphic Disorder.

And, you know, it’s MTV, so it’s not the most tasteful or thoughtful show, but: I don’t really want to talk about reality TV. I was thinking about how being feminist and being aware of privilege makes me really struggle with my own BDD.

I was diagnosed four years ago. It’s definitely gotten worse as time as gone by, and exponentially worse after the rape. It’s also not a disorder that stands alone; it ties in to my bipolar disorder, my anxiety problems.

Autistic Teen Charged With Assault, Disorderly Conduct

Via Terri over at Barriers, Brigdes and Books comes news that an autistic teen was charged with assault and disorderly conduct a few weeks ago, after he became physically aggressive when there were four fire drills in one morning at his school. We do not know whether an appropriate behavior intervention plan was in place, as should have been the case.

I’ve Gone and Done It Now

I have written a manifesto. It’s short as manifestos go… and I think fairly low on scary ramblings (edit, edit, edit!!! 🙂

Here it is:

I believe in the Disability Rights Community.

That is to say, I believe that disability is a natural part of the human experience that is often misunderstood by our culture and I believe in the people with disabilities and their allies who recognize that human beings are undiminished by disability. I support these people who strive for respect, recognition and rights.

Arizona’s Immigration Laws

I came here to study at a university. I took a job from approximately 299 Americans who, presumably, could have done it as well as I did. (Interestingly, the other person on the shortlist told me that he believed hiring me was an act of discrimination and that I had “dogged” him.) I have brown skin. I married an American. I was told I was only into him for the visa. (Almost 20 years later, I still worry about whether I have to prove our relationship is genuine.) I use the health care system. I have paid my speeding ticket and been to traffic school. I pay my taxes. I very definitely pay my taxes; I have been audited and found to owe nothing. And a little while ago, I began the process to naturalize myself as a citizen.

Spending a Moment with You

If you live with a disability, I encourage you to speak up about your experiences. Make a YouTube video, start a blog, participate in a message board. And let me know about it.

I look forward to spending a moment with you.

Recommended Reading for April 23, 2010

This is going to be a quick one from me as I’m out of town right now, attending a Graduate Student Conference on Disability Studies, because my life is awesome. I can’t wait to tell everyone all about it, at length.

Disability Blog Carnival 65: Balance is up at The River of Jordan! The posts are, as always, varied and wonderful.

Eyesight to the Blind [Problematic language in title – see Rainbow’s comment]

When my great-aunt says she’ll pray for me, she’s not saying it because there’s something messed up about me that needs fixing. She’s saying it because she prays for the people she loves. The person I encountered today wasn’t saying it to everybody she passed. She probably saw a person using a mobility scooter and thought something like “disabled person = in need of healing”.

What would healing look like for me?

Tributes paid to David Morris

Tributes have been paid to David Morris, much-loved and respected disability campaigner and mayoral adviser, who passed away yesterday (Sunday), aged 51.

Mr Morris, who was on secondment from his role as Senior Policy Advisor on Disability to the Mayor of London, had been working with the London Organising Committee of the Olympic Games (LOCOG) as External Access and Inclusion Coordinator.

Wild Ride for Number 9

In the end, the name was the same atop the wheelchair division of the Boston Marathon yesterday, but for Ernst Van Dyk it hardly was a typical triumph.

The South African won for a record ninth time, but it was his toughest victory yet. Van Dyk had to surge over the final 2 miles to overtake American Krige Schabort to finish in 1:26:53, a mere 3 seconds ahead of Schabort.

An Open Letter to Charles Tan

When I read your essay you seemed to define promoting cultural diversity by “encouraging people to write about other cultures”. Certainly Buck was encouraged and rewarded – she received a Pulitzer in 1932 and a Nobel Prize in 1938 “for her rich and truly epic descriptions of peasant life in China”. If writing about the Other were such a truly prodigious feat, then surely Vikram Seth should be bestowed with more renown for not one, but two books, set entirely in white people western land?

But transcultural traffic is hardly such an egalitarian affair. You say: “That there is a small but growing awareness of the literature of other cultures is, in my opinion, a liberty that only occurred because of humanity’s continued struggle for “enlightenment” but this flies in the face of a vast body of historical evidence that cultural currency has been a tool of capitalist trade and colonial enterprise. Furthermore, by whose standards are you defining awareness of such literature “small”? There are many Indians who will tell you about Rustam and Sohrab, about Laila and Majnu–stories not actually from our subcontinent. And as Fatemeh Keshavarz points out, Iran has a long history of translating books into Persian.

Follow-up on the Clitoraid post earlier this week: Clitoraid responds to their critics, but key questions remain unanswered

Clitoraid have officially responded to questioning of their organisation and the controversial ‘adopt a clitoris’ fundraising scheme (a summary of discussions to date on this topic can be found here).

On Being Well

Not every disability can be healed. I learned long ago that being “incurable” and being well are possible. But don’t go looking for this anomaly in the rule book. In effect what you need to do is break the rules that have long been established for how to think of being well. I am for instance the best blind sailor in my family. Never mind that I’m the only blind sailor in my family. I did in fact teach my sighted wife how to dock a boat. There’s no rule book for this.

Disability as a Game

In the coming months my children will come to know the terms disablest and able-bodied privilege, because it has become clear to me that while they are empathetic of my personal circumstance because they love me, they are not aware that this very same empathy needs to be extended beyond our little family. Not only do the differently abled have a right to take up space (a struggle they have seen first hand), we deserve not to have our lives mocked for the purposes of entertainment or to deliver a cruel retort.

Top 10 Things That Annoy People in Wheelchairs

In a recent poll done by the Christopher & Dana Reeve Foundation, wheelchair users were asked :

What do family, friends, and strangers do to you when you are using your chair that annoys you?

The Virus-Ridden DNA of Aborted Babies

Well, a new group of people has joined this fight. Rather than being autistic-adults, parents of autistics, or researchers, this group has little personal contact with actual autistic people. Instead, it is one group of pro-life people wanting to use autism as proof of why abortion should be outlawed – never mind that it has no basis in fact!

Recommended Reading for April 19, 2010

A blue-painted brick parking stall with the disability-symbol of a white wheelchair painted on it as well - edited after comment from noracharles
Description: A blue-painted brick wall parking stall with the disability-symbol of a white wheelchair painted on it as well. – edited after comment from noracharles.

Today is the deadline for the Disability Carnival
Check out River of Jordan for more information!

Out of the mouths of babes

Without answering he calls to the guys on the platform a couple floors up. He wants them to move the machine. I can see what a hassle this is. They are going to have to lower the platform, move it a few feet so I can get on my way, move it back so they can be back in position and then raise it back up to where they are working. I felt immediately like this huge bother. But the driver glanced down and saw me and hollered that he’d move the truck.

The platform lowered, it seemed to come down at such a slow pace, I could feel my hair grow as I waited. Joe, who really hates it when we bother people or put people out is standing a few feet ahead looking very perturbed. Once the platform is down, the fellow moves it two or three feet ahead, plenty of room for me to get around. I call out as I’m going around, ‘Sorry to be a bother.’

On growing up with strange sensory reactions, and the difference between passing and being passed off.

This is one reason that I question the entire concept of passing. I rarely spent five minutes around other children before they figured out I was different. Often it was more like five seconds. Kids weren’t generally picking up my intellect or nerdiness (they might pick that up later but not immediately), they were picking up my strangeness. Much of the time they said so quite openly and as we got older they were trying really hard to explain why I was strange. But I was always strange, there was never a point even when I did my best attempt to “behave” that this was ever in question. Even when neuroleptics drastically tamped down on my ability to explore my environment in those ways I could expect to wait seconds before I was pointedly and often out loud judged as some kind of Other. Even among kids in mental institutions where the rate of neuro-atypicality was higher, I only very occasionally connected with anyone and it was always their doing, others just either shunned me or found ways to do harm to me.

Weird thing is even though I heard all about being strange my whole life I always underestimated my strangeness. I rarely connected all the dots in others’ reactions to me. I knew I was different but since I couldn’t imagine how all the things I did looked to others, I assumed I was “normal enough” largely because of that and because I was always around myself and therefore found myself… not boring exactly, but like I was used to me. The same way I never knew my autistic brother stood out that much even though he did (although more in the stiff/nerdy way than the sensory/strange way, we are very different people).

Via Penny in email: groping

This wouldn’t be particularly notable, but today I read in the NY Times Magazine of a study that aims to find out what men’s “real” preferences in women’s body types are by toting around headless mannequins of various dimensions for blind men to grope. Hmm, how many things are wrong with this study?

Via Jonquil: Betty Dodson and Audre Lourde: Can I possibly use the master’s tools to demolish her house? [Post uses blindness as a metaphor, questions of sanity as a metaphor]

Then there is the disturbingly unquestioned position of authority that Betty holds on all things sexual. Reproducing patriarchal systems of hierarchical power, it seems she has reached to far high up the ladder that anyone who dares ask a question is a pariah whose sanity is to be questioned. I had never heard of her before this Clitoraid thing and so it was in naivete that I questioned her ‘expertise’ on the issue of Female Circumcision. Woe unto me for daring.

I have to admit that it is with sadness I wonder out loud if this the cutting edge of North American feminism? Is it that the sum total of feminist thought and mobilizing is about pleasure? We’ve made the entire experience of womanhood all about what is between our legs and not between our ears and in our hearts? That the respect so necessary in building the bridges of sisterhood is to be abandoned because one ‘expert’ must be venerated?

For Want of a Menu Button

The student center building at my university has a couple TV lounges set up for students to use. Through no fault of the student center, the manufacturer of the TVs did not include any sort of ‘menu’ button on the front of the TV itself– so it’s impossible to turn on captions without the remote, for viewers who may need it.

Talking about injury in dance

Equally as salient, for me, is managing the overlap between disability and injury. When I first separated my shoulder, someone sent me a request to participate in a study, the basic question/thesis of which was (whether) disabled dancers get injured more than non. I didn’t participate because I felt the supporting materials showed some bias towards suggesting that disabled dancers were more of a liability. (And, yes, I was feeling pissed off and vulnerable at that time.) I imagine that many of the things injured dancers do to take care of themselves (as if self *were* the injury) are the things I do on a daily basis in an attempt to keep the worst of the symptoms under control. Am I injured? No. But I do live my disability life as if I were. In a weird way, it prepares me for the twists and tweaks of dance injury.

On refusing to tell you my name

In one of those things that some people will nod along to and others will be confused by, I deleted a bunch of accounts late Monday and locked up the other ones as tightly as I could.

Why?

Because someone I work with sent my private email address to someone else. The one that a quick search on any search engine leads to me, directly, with all sorts of things that can get me fired from my job or cut my chances of getting employment.

Specifically, I’m “out” online as being “crazy” [1. I like the term crazy. I embrace the term crazy. I tend not to use it too much online because I know that others don’t like it at all. But I’m crazy, and I’m okay with that.]. I’ve spent most of the past year blogging about having a mental health condition – one that I’ve referred to as being considered “dangerous” to have someone with around.

I’ve tried to be really careful about separating work-online identities. “Anna” is not the name on my ID, and it is not what anyone I work with calls me. Googling my government-ID name and my work-related email address gets you either people who obviously aren’t me, or an unused account on one of the “sort your books” sites. But googling my email address, my private one, leads you here. Or to my now-locked journal. Or to my now-deleted tumblr account.

This is one of the reasons why I get angry when people talk dismissively of those who choose to use pseudonyms online. “Oh,” comes the dismissive sniff. “You’re not willing to stand up behind what you’ve said.” Or “If you really believed that, you’d say it behind your ‘real’ name.”

Women like me – and so many other women and men with “hidden” disabilities, women and men who are trans*, people who are non-gender binary, who are bi or lesbian or gay, people who write about their struggles with racism or sexism or homophobia or bullying at work, people who are otherwise marginalized – risk losing their jobs, having their children taken away from them, risk being attacked in their homes or at work, having their children threatened, just for writing about their lives online.

There are all sorts of reasons people are pseudonymous on the internet. This one was mine. It’s not hard to find people with different, but equally pressing – and even more pressing – reasons for being pseudonymous.

I’m hoping I’ve been overly cautious. I’m hoping this person – who spent Monday sending me threatening emails to my work account – doesn’t notice he now has my private email address. I’m hoping that I look silly and stupid in a couple of weeks when nothing comes of this.

But I can’t count on it.

If you don’t see me posting much for a while, now you know why.

Related Reading:
Once More, With Misdirection
An Object Lesson in pseudonymity and internet privacy
On being a no-name blogger using her real name

Note: Any comments on this post are going to be slow to moderate. I won’t be publishing anything that attacks the person I work with, though, since that person is both not here to defend against such comments, and because I do believe it was one of those things where someone did something thoughtless, rather than deliberately malicious. The results are still the same, though.

Recommended Reading for April 12, 2010

A ramp at the foot of a set of concrete stairs.  It ends on the second step from the bottom, leaving the rest of the stairs to climb
Description: A ramp at the foot of a set of concrete stairs. It ends on the second step from the bottom, leaving the rest of the stairs to climb

Black Bodies

The history of the black body is a long and twisted one. When I say black bodies, I mean the social construction of blackness, our bodies and what they mean. The phenotype of my people has been has so many characteristics ascribed to it, becuase society loves to other bodies that don’t fit it’s standard of what a good body is.

Our bodies were and still are seen as proof that we are less intelligent, inhuman, sexually uncontrollable and a gross deviation from normality. Our hair has been seen as proof of our savage nature, especially hair that dares to defy gravity. Our bodies were put on display in sideshows and in the halls of medicine and even in death we had no safety. For years, medical schools in the north and south used mostly black bodies for research and we had no recourse. Even schools in the north were guilty of this, having bodies shipped to them.

Not a hero, not a tragedy

The astute reader will have spotted that these present a double bind. If I ask for an adjustment or support of some kind, then I’m playing right into the Tragedy discourse — I need very special help, given out of charity, for my pitiful tragic state. If I manage anything interesting or worth commenting on (whether that’s in my own or someone else’s estimation, but note that the two are not necessarily the same), the I am a Hero who overcame adversity actually managed something.

I’ll tell you another secret: I think that’s all really patronizing. Off-the-scale patronizing.

On The Social Construction of Childhood Mental Illness

When I read up on “pediatric bipolar”, most critics use the same logic that went before around every childhood mental illness: “But we didn’t see any of those back in the day.” Now it is quite true that more children these days get a diagnosis of serious mental illness, more children are on psychiatric drugs – 1 in 154 takes an antipsychotic in the U.S. -, and more children receive other services, like special education. I do not believe in the validity of the “pediatric bipolar” concept, because it is nothing like adult bipolar, but that is not the point here. Do these children have a genuine problem, or are we just creating problems so that we can get more children on drugs and in special education?

I believe it’s a little of both, in the sense that, in today’s society, many children who end up on psychiatric drugs and in special education, have genuine problems. However, that does not mean that our society was not structured in a way that reinforces these problems. If our schools cannot take a temperamental child, that child is going to have a genuine problem at school, but that does not mean the child has a mental illness. It might as well mean that the school system has failed the child.

The pain is real, even though you can’t see it

Unless you live with chronic pain, you have no idea what it is like. You don’t just get used to it or learn to tolerate it. You spend your days looking for any kind of relief that you can find. There are times when the pain is so overwhelming it invades your sleep and you cannot process anything but the hurt. It changes who you are and how you relate with people. I sometimes find myself snapping for no other reason than the pain. I have to consciously remind myself that no one did this to me and not to lash out at those I love.

A Small Reminder

And when you throw general disablist bullshit around, what you’re really saying is that you don’t give a fuck about how your behaviour contributes to this. And that your own unexamined privilege is more important than this.

And then you expect me to be polite, suck it up, go deal with it, ’splain to me that your behaviour does in fact *not* contribute to this, when in fact the only reason this is happening, is because in our society disabled people are seen as less worthy, but apparently I’m too stoopid to understand the mechanisms behind my own oppression and someone who never experienced this kind of abuse knows better, which just shows that you do see disabled people as less worthy… aaand – the icing on the cake of FAIL – is to tell me what I should get angry about.

Headlines:

Australia: High-risk teens all but ignored in depression advice

QuickPress: Launch of UKDPC Manifesto for 2010

UK Disabled People’s Council Launches Manifesto for 2010.

The UK Disabled People’s Council (UKDPC) is pleased to announce the launch of an exciting new manifesto for the coming year. The Manifesto for 2010 sets out the UKDPC work programme on key issues that have a decisive impact on justice and rights for disabled people.

The UKDPC Manifesto highlights the essential issues and demands of disabled people for equal rights and justice for 2010. The UKDPC work programme for the coming year will specifically focus on human rights, independent living, the UN Convention on the Rights of Persons with Disabilities (UNCRPD), ensuring the role of disabled people in co-production of future policies and striving to firmly place disability at the top of the political agenda.

They have a three page manifesto at the link. I know it’s election time in the UK.