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Chatterday! Open Thread.

Chatterday! Open Thread.

This is our weekly Chatterday! open thread. Use this open thread to talk amongst yourselves: feel free to share a link, have a vent, or spread some joy.

What have you been reading or watching lately (remembering spoiler warnings)? What are you proud of this week? What’s made your teeth itch? What’s going on in your part of the world?

Today’s chatterday backcloth, a mama meerkat snuggling with her babe, comes via Zooborns.

a meerkat mum snuggles her babe to her belly.


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33 responses to “Chatterday! Open Thread.”

  1. Rosemary

    Awwwwww, that picture is so cute *incoherent squealing noises*

    http://communities.kintera.org/REEVE/blogs/daily_dose/archive/2010/03/18/70341.aspx – looks like Glee is hiring an actual wheelchair user for a guest part. The article keeps using the phrase “wheelchair-bound”, so that’s kind of grating.

  2. Rosemary

    wooops – I switched the link to the original source instead of the article I initially read and the blog I linked to above doesn’t use that phrase! SORRY!

  3. nuri

    I hate the atmosphere that lets people with learning disabilities languish, once they are out of school, until forced to say something. I’m training a new person at work, and he didn’t tell me until halfway through training that he’s dyslexic. I didn’t even find out from him, another new person told me.

    He didn’t want to let anyone know in case it would lead to him not being hired. I saw he was struggling, but I couldn’t hit on the right way to get to him until I prodded, when I then sat with him and tried to figure out what would work for him in the way of accommodations and adaptations.

    But ugh, I went through this with my ADHD too. I managed through training fine, but he wasn’t. Still isn’t. I’m getting a sort of week with him for extra time, and hopefully he’ll make it now.

  4. Caitlin

    I had to leave work last night because I was completely freaking out. I spent an hour in the office with my manager (who is awesome and really does get it, due to some experiences of her own), after spending about fifteen minutes just sitting on my stock cart in the cereal aisle crying and shaking and hyperventilating, and then left. Called Shannon and went to her place and slept on her couch instead of going home.

    My manager suggested I think about taking a leave of absence while I get my head around this, which would be great, except they aren’t paid, which makes it absolutely not at all feasible for me. My parents would give me money if I asked – they know what’s going on – but they can’t really afford it any more than I can. So awesome!manager is going to look into how I might go about getting put on medical leave, which would mean I WOULD get paid. But it can’t be stress leave, since Walmart doesn’t accept stress leave.

    Well, we’ll see how it goes anyway, but I still hate this. I feel so useless. Cognitively, I know this is healing/coping/dealing/whatever, all this freaking out and crying I’ve been doing, but it feels like I’m totally out of control and that terrifies me.

    On a happier/whatever note, last night while I was in the office with awesome!manager, her phone rang: it was one of the crew and he thought that someone should go find me (I wasn’t where I should have been and he actually was management till a week ago, so he knows the basics of the situation, so he was worried – he’s a huge sweetheart).

    We’re such a small crew (nine crew, two managers) that we’re pretty close, and on the one hand it helps to know that my co-workers actually care, but on the other they don’t know what it is that’s going on, so sometimes they ask the wrong questions.

  5. KJ

    Nuri, that must be so hard. I admit I never, ever tell a work place about my LDs until I am good and hired.

    I had a nice week. I went to Seattle (which was not as rainy as people said it would be!) and had an interview at an art therapy grad program. I loved the program, but am a bit on edge, since I learned they have 65 applicants for 16 slots. I really want to get in, but I am preparing myself for the worst. I hate waiting, it always makes my anxiety level rise greatly. Hey, I’m creating a series of sculptures about my own mental illnesses and GAD is next on the list, so maybe I can use this feeling. Yah for art as catharsis.

    KJ

  6. Kaitlyn

    @Caitlin – I’m glad you’ve got a great working environment – or great people helping the environment.

    I love when people are kind, it just melts my heart. This week, in addition to the dramz detailed in last week’s chatterday thread (I’ll update when I’m done with this happy stuff), I went outside my comfort zone, and put myself out there. Okay, there were no consequences, but it was still scary. They were showing a movie in the new UC and I wasn’t sure I’d be able to sit comfortably. So I called and e-mailed and just said, “I want to see this movie, but I’m worried about pain.” No diagnosis revealed, nothing beyond “I want to see this movie and I want to be comfortable.” They were so helpful, and they asked me before and after and an hour before the movie, I got an e-mail with pics of the chairs!

    Another random act of kindness – last Sunday I was at Kroger and it was packed. I normally fill a basket (orange juice and popcorn and hummus and clementines) but I had to use a cart (it was so funny, it was so empty!) because they were well, busy, and the baskets hadn’t been moved from the cash registers.

    So I grabbed a cart, and a man stopped me and said the wheels are bad. That’s nice enough, except he went beyond and GAVE ME HIS CART. It would have taken like 10 seconds for me to get another cart, but no, he gave me his. And he reinforced my silly belief that true southern gentlemen are older black men. (Usually dressed in a dapper fashion.) Perhaps just in the city. I don’t know.

    Finally, mom and dramz. I was worried about the car ride because she’s been on (unpaid) spring break, so unlike other appointments, she couldn’t yammer away about school and school gossip while I paid enough attention to go “EW!” when she brought up poop. But on the way back, there was still gossip for me to ignore because of the unpaid snow days that they want them to wake up and this is only interesting if your paycheck depends on it!

    Today, I was happy without trying too hard, she didn’t harp on my looks or my attitude. (Wednesday I was ordered to smile.) I just was happy and bouncy and silly and relatively pain free – I walked around the shopping center from Old Navy to the sandwich place to Kroger (“it’s so far” sez mom. “You want me to walk more,” sez I, “and that involves not just the parking lot but the walk to the dorm.” “I have to pee,” sez she.) because I felt good and happy and it’s so gorgeous I wanted to be at home in the backyard, except PROBLEM – it’s shorts weather and dogs have claws and dogs like my lap, so it’s best I’m at the dorm.

    One silly excerpt – Dr Ego’s waiting room sometimes has People or Time. Usually it’s baby or mom mags, but today, there was the paper (no comics section) and 2 copies of a business magazine! So I said, “Come on, we’re at a GYN, let’s do some stereotypes, I want some trashy tabloids – what is Khloe Kardashian doing? Business Times? I have a lady brain!” I got a chuckle, and then I refilled my water bottle and settled down to reading my book (YA – Anne Frank and me – so weird, the catalyst for the events of the book is shooting in a Holocaust museum. The book was published in 2001, and definitely before the Sept. 11th attacks!) until I was called.

    Mom didn’t come with me – I told the nurse she goes through phases where she gets tired of it and decides I’m an adult, so she goes to Wal-Mart and buys bad chicken and radishes. Well, today she did. And she got me an Archie comic book – omg I was so silly, I read them Thursday because I was in transition – just finished Anne Frank’s diary, had books at the library, didn’t want to start anything big – and I cracked people up in my history of religion class before it started. “I’m an honors student in an upper division class and I’m reading my comic book. *theatrical gasp* Archie and Betty are together! What if Veronica sees?!” (I said all that.) My history of religion class – ugh – we started “religion and violence” with the sept. 11th attacks and someone said “Muslims can’t separate politics and religion.” I basically shouted, “That’s a blatant lie!” (why did I say blatant?) So I’m not sure about next Tuesday, because the ignorance about Islam will make me headdesk and yes, I brought up suicide Thursday, but it will come up, and to combat my bad feelings, I’ll verbally slap somebody if they say anything wrong about suicide. Or I’ll start crying. So I may not go.

    Anyways… Dr Ego was pretty nice, normal. He wanted to increase my anti-depressant instead of changing it, and the sheet I carry around says I’m on 50mgs of it, but I’m actually on 100. So his increase did nothing. And it’s Friday, so I have to wait. I don’t know if he wants me on 200mgs or not. Of course, I should have said, I’m not sure, can you check *your* records? But no. (I seriously need to update that thing!!)

    I have had a great last two weeks, compared to my normal state before an appointment, because I finally had enough pain medication where I wasn’t rationing it and going, “Is this really bad enough?” until it got beyond bad enough, and I ran out before the appointment.

    So he writes the same prescription, no problem, la dee da, drop off scrips at walgreens, call us if there are any problems. We come back (after I walk around the parking lot and stock up on hummus – I don’t think 4 containers are enough, but I found my husband in my history of religion class Thursday – he’s Lebanese and thus has hummus access (!!!!) Oh well, it’s not the worst thing to be hooked on.) and “insurance won’t fill your percocet until april 8th, because it’s a 2 month supply.” But I got it filled 2/22! Then I look at the directions. Take 1 3x a day, and 180 pills. Except I told him a thousand times (or at enough volume) that I need to take 2 at a time, 3x a day. So now I need to call insurance and/or the doctor, but because I have enough Percocet, I can survive the weekend.

    Also, he started me on a new medication, it’s anti-seizure (my pain is definitely nerve related somehow) and it’s called “Lamictal.” Anyone have any experience?

    Finally, I am done with PT, which makes me sad, because apart from the hair-pulling screaming pain, I had fun and it was a nice environment. They told me to call, so I did today because I had a question I meant to ask during an appointment but never did.

    My heating pad is amazing. It is longer than the one at home, and it gets so hot. It’s plugged in. I could take it to class and plug it in next to the guy who plugs in his laptop, but there are non-electrical ones, portable ones out there. So I called to ask if they were worth it. And it doesn’t sound like they are – my PT said people say thermacare gets hot, but icyhot does not get hot enough. And the kicker – most are adhesive (I thought they were adjustable belts with velcro or something) and since I need it on my abdomen/pelvic area, I know it won’t work. (Dr Ego’s given me patches to put on there before and they never stayed – I walked, sat, breathed, moved.)

    But well more info can’t hurt – has anyone had success with portable heating pads?

    And I am very sad to report that the Tenge unit (the electrical thingie) is a no-go for me. I saw it mentioned in passing by one of the bloggers here as a tool for making it through the day, and I was so excited the first time! It didn’t hurt while the unit was on, but last week when we discussed me taking one home (they cost 60 US$) for testing, they did not work and seemed to make it worse.

    Very busy week, glad it’s over. I’ve got two tests next week, one easy and in English, one not so easy and in French. And a paper to rewrite (in French). And then a test the next week (in English).

    I’m silly and chatty.

    Oh! Random acts of kindness and niceness – I love complimenting people’s clothes, even if I’m just passing them and will probably never see them again. I hope it makes people happy. I love talking to strangers on campus, fellow students I’m in the laundry room or kitchen or elevator or tiger den or whatever.

    Miss scatterbrain. Two more things – my therapist called Dr Ego (I warned her so she wouldn’t be surprised if he lived up to his nickname) and he asked me why she would do that. Uh, who demanded to know what happened in therapy sessions last month? Lordy, major eyeroll moment. He never brought up release forms or collaboration or anything! I did, and my therapist is more than happy to work with him.

    Finally, final final, I hope. I have a new roommate and a new TV. I got the TV Wednesday ($150, HD, has a remote!!!, and codeman, comes with CC!) and came home with my TV and archie comics ready to set it up and then go to the movie (the one where I called people about chairs) … only, the door was unlocked. And there was stuff on the other side of the room. I did it, I jinxed myself twice. I said, Mom, I should give you my big headphones (I use them for TV watching – the base connects, but not the phones so you don’t have to be within a foot) because hey, no roommate, it’s the week after spring break! I also said, oh, I can just move the old boxy TV out of the way, shove it to the dresser behind my new shiny one, because hey, no roommate.

    She seems nice, but the administration dropped the ball in taking so long to move her, because my room’s been empty since the 2nd or 3rd week of the semester. And I’m 2 or 3 doors down from her old room.

    Well, that was a lot! Ya’ll need what they have at the Oscars, play me off the stage – “wait, I haven’t thanked my preschool teacher yet!!!”

  7. Kaitlyn

    In the aggravation world (I posted this in rec reading in a not so subtle hope to get it linked), there was an article in the school paper and the quote above the fold said, “Going to the psychology building to say you’re gay is like going to say you’re crazy.”

    Grr.

    I wrote a blog post – http://ohmonkeytrumpets.blogspot.com/2010/03/daily-helmsman-pissed-me-off-today.html – and a letter to the editor. I got an e-mail back saying my concerns were invalid, so they wouldn’t be running my letter, because they weren’t insulting those who do go because they’re crazy, they’re talking about the mistreatment of queer students on campus. Which I acknowledged. But I still had a big fat insult staring me in the face in the school paper! And I wish they would run it, because I pointed out in the letter that “crazy” students don’t have support groups.

    If they do run a letter to the editor about the article – http://media.www.dailyhelmsman.com/media/storage/paper875/news/2010/03/19/News/Students.Seek.Lgbt.Safe.Zone-3892206.shtml – it will most likely be a “gays are bad, this I know, because the bible tells me so(-ad)” type. Bah.

  8. anthea

    I finally have a formal dyspraxia diagnosis – hoorah! Turns out I’m much more impaired in some areas than I thought I was, and I’ve been feeling a bit emotionally weird about it – it’s definitely positive, particularly as I get arrangements made for exams, but there are also elements of “crap, no wonder it’s been so hard” and “why wasn’t this picked up before”.

    Also in the process of buying a house for the first time, which has thrown up all kinds of things. Let’s just say that if you have difficulty keeping up with the basics of housework, it’s actually a wonder if you survive moving. Also, it turns out you can’t redirect your mail online without a drivers license – you have to fill out a paper form. For no valid reason. Which is painful for me, and there’s probably a correlation between people who struggle with hand writing and driving. Rah. And then there’s the ridiculous insistence all kinds of places have on the telephone. Which sometimes I can use okay, sometimes I can but it is exhausting, and sometimes I just can’t. And the form for repayment insurance, which wants to know my history of mental illness (aside from not wanting that recorded, I wouldn’t know how and where to start – particularly as half the things I was told I had were clearly wrong), the contact details for my doctor (don’t have one, don’t plan to get one except in certain extreme circumstances, they’ve screwed up my life and my health enough) and my weight (which is well in to the obese category, and I’m much healthier than I was when I was starving myself).

    OTOH living in my own home (assuming it works out – purchase could still fall down) is going to make so many things so much easier, and work is being very understanding of my lack of focus and irregular hours. And I’ve also bought a Blackberry which is completely life changing in terms of organising my life.

  9. thetroubleis

    So I finally figured out what I want to do with my life, to some extent.

    I’ve been at 3 day career workshop with Voc Rehab that I just got back from, which was really helpful. I’m looking into schools right now, but I’m hoping to major in history and then move on to prehaps become an archivist or curator. They aren’t something I had thought of before, but looking into the fields, it seems to me it’s work I could be happy doing.

  10. thehyacinthgirl

    My disability sometimes makes me feel vulnerable and unsafe. Among other things, I have significant visual impairments and I am a small woman, so I often feel like a walking target for violence. And of course any “advice” I get about how to “protect” myself is victim-blamey BS, or suggests that I further limit my *already limited* daily outings and activities. : ( Does anyone else deal with this?

  11. Anna

    Hello everyone! I’m at my first Academic Conference this weekend, presenting on the letters one of the students at the school I study wrote home, and talking about how it’s important to focus on the actual words of PWD when writing history. It’s a bit early for me this morning, so I don’t know how clearly I have stated that.

    There is now coffee. I am a happier camper.

  12. Kaitlyn

    Thehyacinthgirl – most “protect yourself” guides are victim-blamey. Phooey on them. The only rule is “Don’t attack somebody. If you think you might, have a buddy along to stop you.”

    A local girl was gang raped recently. I saw the blurbs while watching tv shows, but no local news if I can help it – I can just picture a mom from her school saying “She should have…” and on that disastrous Wednesday, I got it from my mom. Her crimes? She skipped school to have sex with one guy. That’s all that’s out officially. Mom thinks she’s “crying rape” so her mom won’t know she’s sexually active. Head, meet desk.

    I’m not a coffee person, Anna, so I think it acts like Popeye’s spinach? Best of luck!

  13. Broggly

    http://www.abc.net.au/elections/sa/2010/guide/lc-results.htm
    It looks like Kelly Vincent could get into the Legislative Council. While these predictions don’t take into account people voting “below the line” (choosing their own preference order instead of one decided by the party they voted for), I think Vincent has a really good chance of getting the seat as long as at least a third of the Democrats prefer her/voted above the line. I personally put her just under the Greens so my vote will help her out in the final contest against the Liberal party(and yes, I know our voting system is a bit confusing.)
    Since neither major party will control the senate, and the two independents remaining on bad terms with each other, Vincent could get a reasonable amount of power out of this.

    Anyway, even if she doesn’t win, a primary result putting her just behind all the big parties is a great outcome for D4D.

  14. Annie

    I leave for the airport in about five minutes. I’m terrified–I’m traveling for 15 hours, which at the best of times takes a lot out of me. I’m always too paranoid about strangers to sleep (have been since I was a teenager and dealing with abuse stuff), so I get to the destination exhausted with a breakthrough migraine. And today’s worse because I’ve been up since early, running errands with a friend.

    I love my family; I’m thrilled to have a chance to go home. But I’m worried that I’m going to feel beaten up and wiped by the time I get there. (Especially since I’ve had bad experiences with accessibility in a couple places I’m going through.)

    And let’s not even talk about the fact that I have very limited amounts of safe food with me, because of the friend who took me on errands this morning. (Hi migraine, I see you. Please don’t visit until morning, k? Joint pain, hold off. That’s all I ask. And exhaustion, I know you’re pleased to already be here. But perhaps this could be a quick trip and then the current med can make me hyperactive again?)

  15. Astrid

    Internet connection is down for an unspecified time period. We got a virus on the ward computer (not the computer I use) and of course the ISP blocked our connection. Someone deleted the virus scanner log files,s o now we can’t comply with the ISP requirements. Too bad most people are acting like the ISP is at fault and “punishing” us rather than working with them to restore our access. Am now on my home connection, but will not be here for awhile after today.

  16. CapriUni

    So — I know it’s more than a month away (but not that much more) — but does anyone know any news about B.A.D.D. 2010?

    I tried to Google it yesterday, and all I got were links to last year’s posts…

    I figured if anyone would know, it would likely be someone here. …

  17. Kaitlyn

    I just thought of something when it comes to shock!horror about celebs taking pills and drugs.

    In the recent (last couple of years) episode of the Simpsons where their post-high school courtship was moved to the early-mid 90s and they made fun of Melrose Place or 90210 or something. Homer was the lead singer in band like Nirvana. Marge found him with a syringe in his arm. She flushed it, as he protested, “But I need it!” The cry of a junkie, you say.

    Marge, narrating – “turns out he actually did need it, it was insulin.”

    So just a way not to rush to judgment – stars are human, too, they get sick as well.

  18. minna

    I saw an episode of ‘hungry beast’ for the first time this week, and they ran a story on intersex which DIDN’T make me angry! I’m sure on a rewatch I might spot things that weren’t great, but they were obviously trying to be as respectful as possible, and it was mostly a space for the two people they interviewed to talk about their experiences, so I’ve been singing their praises the last couple of days. (There was a forum discussion after which I haven’t checked out.)

    Is anyone else familiar with the show? It was on one of the ABC channels.

    I’m pretty heavily involved in the local egl community, and there’s a meet next week, so I’m pretty excited about that :D I’m scoping the venues this afternoon/tomorrow, because the person who arranged it is new and while I’m sure she’s great, there are a few too many issues that weren’t really thought about the last few meets. :( There’s a tendency to treat meets like a few friends meeting up, but there’s too many of us for that these days. Plus it now includes women with varying levels of fatigue, blindness and the average height is five foot nothing, so. It’s nice when new girls organise meets, but it does create quite a bit of extra running around to make sure the proposed venues are actually useable, and that ‘not far from public transport’ is in fact actually not far, never mind the political negotiating when they DO need to be changed.

  19. Norah

    I hit my big toe on a tableleg yesterday and bruised it badly and tore up the nail :S.

    It’s not the first time (it’s the first time for this particular toe though) (-_-’)

    Yay coordination / motor-skills / visual-spatial / whatever-it-is issues?

  20. Lizzibee

    I’ve been lurking for a few months but never had anything to share on chatterday before. But yesterday I went to the gold medal sledge hockey game at the Paralympics and it was amazing! It was so cool to see these amazing world class athletes getting cheered by a stadium full of people screaming at the top of their lungs.
    I’m from Vancouver so I’m aware (and agree with a lot of) the controversy about the olympics/Paralympics. But this was still an awesome experience, even if Canada wasn’t in the gold medal game [result spoiler redacted by mod ~L].
    And I know it’s been said elsewhere, but I want to emphasize how cool it was that there were so many kids at the game – the tickets to the Paralympics were way less expensive than the tickets to the olympics ( which is a problem in itself I know) and so it was more accessible for many people to take their children with them. I just think it’s great for so many young people to see these incredible disabled athletes as role models and national athletes to be proud of, just like the Olympic athletes are.

  21. sarahj

    I am SO late for chatterday, but I’ll share something anyway.

    I’m taking my drivers test on Friday, which is step 1 to getting my permit in early April. My main concern is that my anxiety might cloud my judgement and skills while driving. It’s making me very, very nervous to get out on the road. The writing portion should be easy, but it’s still nervewracking anyway.

    Wish me luck!

  22. Kaitlyn

    Wow. This week’s Simpsons is kicking butt. At least the first few minutes.

    Bart’s class has to merge with the other 4th grade class. Nelson sits next to a kid who knocks over his lunch box. GRR.

    And then the kid gets up to get the lunchbox, apologizing. And he has a cane. “OMG, you’re blind,” sez Nelson. Nelson then says he will beat up anyone picking on the blind kid, and he tells the blind kid that he’s not a freak. The blind kid responds that he doesn’t think he is. Nelson calls him brave.

    So much fun with PWD tropes!

    Also – the kids were nice to Lisa when they thought she was failing, but then she wasn’t, and they taunted her with shouts of “Gifted! Gifted!” “No, I’m just advanced, you can catch up!” Too realistic.

  23. Quijotesca

    May or may not have found a dentist. I can’t make an appointment until April 1st. I might try some of the places I called again because I think I might’ve been saying the wrong thing by specifying Medicaid and not the HMO. In the past, that’s been rejected for being a Medicaid plan, which is why I mention Medicaid instead, so I’m not really holding my breath. :/ Ug, why must it be so complicated?

  24. Kaitlyn

    I watched “The Usual Suspects” before the Simpsons.

    Interesting play on PWD tropes… especially with the twist (I went in knowing, which only helps – look for clues!)… he chose to look like that because who suspects a “cripple”?

    Don’t watch if you don’t like derogatory terms tossed at a PWD. But death and the f word – oh sure, why not! No boobies on screen, but a brief (flashback – lie?) rape scene.

    It got me thinking – gangster movies, heist movies – they show people being really tolerant.
    In Maqbool (Macbeth adaptation, bored me silly despite Tabu and Irrfan), Muslims and Hindus worked together!
    Religion, sex, gender, race, ethnicity, BODY – all less important than money and/or murdering rats.

  25. willow329

    @Kaitlyn–Re Lamictal

    I know I’m way late to this, but I didn’t see any replies about the Lamictal, so I thought I’d share what I know about it. I am on it as a mood stabilizer, not for pain though. It’s in the general class of anti-epileptic drugs. I do know that they usually say to start at a low dose and move up gradually–25 mg at night for a few days to a week, then 25 twice a day for a week, then move up by 25 mg increments until you find a dose that works. They generally say it starts to become effective at about 100 mg, but it differs for everyone. I personally am on 150 mg. The big thing to watch out for is a rash. If you get a rash while starting Lamictal, please please please call the dr. right away. Other than that, it has the usual weight gain/insomnia/etc side effect thing for anti-epileptic drugs. I personally like the way it works for me very well. It’s the first mood stabilizer I’ve tried and I’m very happy with it.

  26. Kaitlyn

    Thanks, Willow329!

    He did say it was anti-seizure, but seizure=nerves=why can’t I control her pain, I’m dr ego dammit! (paraphrasing, perhaps.)

    I’ll be on the 25 mgs for a month, and when I see him again, it’ll be near the end of the semester, but I’ll keep this in mind. (I have eczema that flares up when I, um, scratch. and the heat? Helpful!)

    I don’t know why he didn’t want to increase it like that, but he did say it was a low dose and he wanted to wait a month and blah blah blah.

  27. Kaitlyn

    Oh fiddlesticks – I forgot to say I’m actually on 50mgs – 25mgs twice a day.

    And it’s not too late (for me, anyway) and I’m happy for you because it’s working for you. It would be nice if it stabilized my moods and helped my pain. Wonder drug!

    Ok, someone needs to get off the computer and try to sleep… :X

  28. Seattle Winter

    I have a question for you incredible feminists –

    We’re all super familiar with various derailing tactics people use to shut down meaningful conversation about disability and feminist issues (I know I am)… and I’ve developed some good responses to some of them. But one I have encountered and can’t seem to deal with in any effective way is humor. Not saying humor is bad obviously, I’m funny, and I like to laugh – but it’s so annoying and infuriating when I am trying to express some frustration relating to disability activism, and someone uses humor to totally derail the conversation – cut me off, change topic, and minimize the issue.

    How do you valiant activists cope with this? Have you found a good response or tactic for limiting the derailing potential of this tactic?? I have not, and it’s so upsetting.

  29. Kaitlyn

    I don’t know, Seattle Winter, and I’m still ticked when I think of something that happened years ago online.

    I wrote out a long post on schools (in the US) and No Child Left Behind on a message board where we frequently discussed everything, including US politics.

    One response.

    I got one response.

    And it was from someone I’d hated who grabbed the word “behind” from NCLB and wrote a oneliner about thongs. He was being “funny,” I guess.

  30. Norah

    If it’s online, I often use Derailing For Dummies, adapt an example to use the derailing words someone actually used in a chat or comments, and post that with a link.
    That way not just the person who did it gets it pointed out, but everyone else that sees it at least can take a look and make up their mind about derailing and maybe don’t give much weight to the derailing comment.

    If it’s not online, I could print stuff out, hand it out.

  31. willow329

    Kaitlyn–Love it that you call him Dr. Ego (not the reason for it, but….you know, the name is hilarious. I’ve had docs like that). I hope I didn’t give you the impression that your doc is “doin it rong” as far as dosages. I just meant to say that I heard the general rule is to “start low and go slow” with the dosages. Maybe you need less when using it for pain?

    About the eczema and the rash from Stevens-Johnson–I don’t know what your eczema looks like obviously, but I thought it might be helpful to link you to some pics of SJS. (NOT to scare you, just to show you what it looks like–honest. It’s really rare) So here’s a link from Google images: http://images.google.com/imgres?imgurl=http://www.eczema-answers.com/images/sjs_baby.jpg&imgrefurl=http://www.eczema-answers.com/stevens-johnson-syndrome.html&usg=__T_P4lc16_P0jylnh0ycRoRcwd_g=&h=224&w=180&sz=13&hl=en&start=16&itbs=1&tbnid=I1jYDQ18FujhwM:&tbnh=108&tbnw=87&prev=/images%3Fq%3Dstevens%2Bjohnson%2Bsyndrome%26hl%3Den%26gbv%3D2%26tbs%3Disch:1

  32. Kaitlyn

    Thanks for the link (you don’t know what my skin’s been through, so I saw that and was just like. Huh.) and the info!

    I don’t know everything about my body, but I do know the different kinds of pain, and I definitely know the different kinds of skin problems – long term allergic reaction vs short term, heat rash, etc. So even if this link is buried if it happens (and I hope it doesn’t – Lyrica worked so well until the side effects took over), I’ll just go hmm, that looks new.

    Skin example – because we just don’t talk enough about skin problems here! – yesterday I went home and spent time with my dogs because why not. They were all over me, presumably because Mom, as usual, does not love them. Dixie drooled on me, I held Mikey, put him down, he danced, I held him again. I sat down, pet Dixie, Mikey sat on me. So without scratching, my left elbow got really inflamed (the inside). And then there was the ride home from the vet with his Majesty, sir Wickett. I took a benadryl and a shower when I got home and conked out a couple hours later. This morning – not a trace.

    So I don’t know the causes of everything, but hey, I’ve had skin problems since before this new fangled millennium. Don’t trust it, in my day, years began with 19!


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