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By Chally on 8 February, 2010
Question Time is a series in which we open up the floor to you, commenters. We invite you to share as you feel comfortable.
What are some really odd questions you’ve been asked about being disabled?1
Posted in Question Time
When I was a kid, I would get “Does that mean you’re stupid?” when I told people I had learning disabilities.
I also get asked, when I tell folks I have a “non verbal LD” if that means I’m non-verbal. When I just used my voice (that is a clue folks).
On a fun note, when I told someone I am planning to become an art therapist, he asked me “So, do you like, inspire artists?” No, dude, that is a MUSE! And though it would be cool to be an immortal goddess, a master’s degree cannot make you immortal. Nice try though.
I think my oddest so far was the 2nd appointment with my GP. So she had rapidly read up on cfs (she was a registrar, she hadn’t had a patient with cfs before) and had got my files from the previous 4 GPs since onset.
Dr J: So, you are mostly troubled with a sore throat?
Me: (puzzled) Well, yes, my throat is sore, but I’m more concerned with the pain in my joints, the inability to sleep/wake, the cognitive impairment, the headaches, periodically losing the use of my legs ….
I had a fun time when I bumped into a friend I hadn’t seen for years, who asked why I had a walking stick… upon being told I have ME, he got really concerned and asked if I was “going to be all right” – he clearly had no idea what it was and thought it was a terminal illness!
I haven’t been asked a lot of questions, and I’m not sure which ones classify as odd, but to me the strangest question I *have* regularly been asked (it’s not even really a question that people expect an answer to, more of a statement), is some variation of: “Wow, that must have been such a lot to deal with / such an adjustment!” (Referring to my autism diagnosis, which I got at 24, as if that is when the autism suddenly started and I hadn’t been autistic all my life before that. All the diagnosis changed for me was disability income).
I might, at some point in the future, stop being bitter about “Is your husband capable of sex?”, but not soon.
.-= Anna´s last blog ..T.V.! =-.
Awhile ago someone asked me if my brain worked the way my mouth did, meaning did my brain repeat thoughts and ideas, like my speech repeats vowels and other parts of speech. I simply responded, “Where did you get that idea?”..
It’s a peek at my ghastly family dynamic: My brother, who most likely got the question from my grandmother, asked my wife “Do you think [k0]’s hormones made her suicidal?”
Context: I was recently hospitalized with symptoms of depression and anxiety and suicidal ideation. I’m trans* and I’ve been on the same hormone replacement regimen for years. My grandmother is emotionally abusive and currently wants me to: change all my doctors; get off all my meds especially hormones, psychotropics, and pain meds; stop being trans* and homosexual and weird; and to leave my wife. My brother has acted as a conduit in the past which I’ve attributed to his wanting to be the peacemaker and fix things. I found out recently that when he’s frustrated in getting to fix/rescue people he gets abusive.
So that’s fun.
the question i get that i consider the oddest is “what do you think your life would be like if you didn’t have your disability?” to which i always feel like responding, “i don’t know – what do you think your life would be like if you weren’t you?”
There are two questions I usually get, if you will bear with me:
The one I can normally handle is the obvious one: people who see me with my white cane ask me if I can see. I respond by saying yes, I can, but being vague about how much, and where.
The question that *really* sticks in my craw? When I’m trying to explain that I have difficulty seeing movement, and they respond by waving their hand/arm/random object in front of my face, very quickly, and then asking me what I see. ARGH!
“How do you sleep? Do you use a bed or stay in your chair?” – NO JOKE!
my Odd Questions (to perpetuate that old cliché, i have been reading this freakin’ amazing blog/site for quite awhile, but now i feel a bit more comfortable and now…i post!)
BEWARE! THIS POST CONTAINS TANGENTS AND QUITE A BIT OF RANDOMNESS, AS WELL!! (and hey, if you hate my posty, do feel free to comment/criticize, or even if you’re just feeling lonely and isolated^.^)
two halloweens ago, a very good friend and i decided to play silly halloween games, we played Hide and Seek (of course, we did require more players for that one), and went trick or treating. i was about 22 at the time and required that extra stability that my cane is awesome at providing. my cane is solid wood (which kind, i coun’t tell you) that has some really awesome and colorful laminations. soo cool!
so back to the haloween: none of our motley band of misfits (me included) really dressed for the occasion (we didn’t play goths, or vampires, or any other current pop culture villains,lol). despite our obvious ages (yeah, a 6’3″ in jeans and a hoodie…an amazing costume!), many of the handers of candy would offer a smile or a wink when candy was deposited into our pillowcases.
because of my age (or lack there of, i’m 24 now), pretty much anyone passing by would toss a comment as they walked by. i don’t really remember the vast majority of them, one particular epithet has stuck with me…’Super-Crip!’
now, i have a rather quirky and esoteric sense of humor, so ‘Super-Crip’ has, in a way, become a bizarre kind of ‘damn the man…!” and is kinda empowering for me in a way that’s hard to explain at all^.^ for many of you, a nickname like ‘Super-Crip’ can be such a distressing and painful string of words that you avoid using it in any manner. so yes, Super-Crip is, for me an empowering statement to remind myself that while i have limitations, they do not have me. and that type of snotty-in-yer-face isn’t something that works for everyone. so i want to say that while this is one of the ways that i cope with feelings of helplessness and completely dependent on someone else to help me get through the day.
i just really hope that there are other/more “interesting” people out there who are fighting for the rights and interests of ‘disAbled’ people and the people who love and support them.
sorry for rambling so off-topic, i’m recovering from a couple minor surgeries and am medicated to the eyeballs >.<
.-= AbominableSnowPickle´s last blog ..the day after =-.
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